It's Summer--the joys and pitfalls of it all!

I love summer!  I hate summer!

I love summer because we can go to bedtime late, have plenty of free play time, and just enjoy swimming and playing.

I hate summer because we have no schedules, and I have a hard time finding ways to meet Emily's needs.

Last summer, we did home school with the boys.  We learned about Australia, read Bible stories together, and worked on story maps of Robert Munsch books.  When I thought about doing that this summer, I just remember the tremendous amount of work that went into creating the curriculum.  In some ways, I felt like I was putting Emily's needs in front of the boys.  It is always a balancing act when you have kids that need you more than others!

This summer, I thought I would try and sign her up for camps.  She didn't do that last summer, but has done camps in the past.  I was super excited, and thought I did my due diligence in explaining her autism.  However, it turned out to be a disaster.  I didn't prepare them for Emily, nor did I prepare Emily for the camp.  It was too chaotic, too much for her.  I failed.  It was hard on me, the parent.

She has two more camps this summer, and I want at least one of these to work, for her to be successful at the camp.  (Does that mean that I'm successful too?)  I hope that I can begin a dialogue with them about Emily--what works what doesn't.  Even discuss if this is the right type of class for her.  Take the failure--which Emily doesn't care about--and turn it into a success--which Emily does care about.

We will see how I do.  It is so hard for me to communicate, to talk to others about Emily, to fight for her without being confrontational.  I want to be completely honest, yet I'm often blinded to her faults because I am her mother.  I want everyone to know that she is so much more than her outbursts, her sensory overloads, her lack of social skills.  She is amazing!  She has so many talents that are often hidden behind the mask of autism.

I want to jump up and say she is amazing, you just don't know.  But what does Emily want, what does Emily need?  Am I doing these things to help her "be normal"? Am I doing these things to somehow fulfill a need of my own? As I ask myself these and this very important question, "Will this really help her?" And then, honestly answer  I believe they will, then I need to do a better job of preparing Emily and those who care for her this summer to make it successful.   Wish me luck!  I'm going to need it.